End of Week 1

I have a heart to change the world, one aching woman at a time, staring with myself.

I have begun a journey that refuses to allow me to pull over for a pit stop. I’m in for the long haul considering my goals and hopeful ministry.

Some things that have happened over the past seven days on the first trek of this adventure has been uplifting and encouraging, yet confusing and frustrating. Trying to find my hidden sin wasn’t easy, because don’t we all look at ourselves and claim perfection? You don’t? Oh, well…it must just be me, then. Because I don’t always know my sin. Sometimes my sin is not knowing my sin. I scratch the surface and say, “No God…no sin here.” And God must laugh.

Surface sin is easily overlooked and mistaken as “mistakes” or everyday life occurrences. We poo-poo it away. Not good, but justifiable. It just doesn’t look all that bad…on the surface.

But it’s that deep-rooted sin that has been lingering around for so long we don’t even know it’s there. We are incredibly clueless about it. For some it’s pride in unusual forms, and for others it's unforgiveness that keeps needing excuses.

Today I had an encounter with my own personal sin. It attacked me, persuaded me, and lured me in. I battled with it for a few minutes and then decided to walk away from it. I called my mother and cried. In the process, something beautiful came out of it. My mother and I shared a lovely forty-five minutes encouraging one another in areas of our lives that have been such struggles. When I went back to face my sin head on, I resolved myself to resist taking the bait. I found a healthy, positive, loving way to deal with it instead.

Quite honestly, what I’ve learned this week is to trust God entirely! That doesn’t mean I’m doing it entirely, it just means I know I need to. I also know that I’m often afraid of what God will say to me, so I tend to cut my time short with Him, or plain and simply don’t give Him an opportunity to speak to me. I must be missing out on a lot…

Week 2? Bring it on! I'm ready. (Thankfully I haven't jumped ahead in the book, because my other weed that needs extensive pulling is always running ahead of God! "Show me God and I'll go...ahead of You, of course...)